Capcanele mintii umane: Cele 12 feste pe care ti le joaca creierul

Mintea umana este complexa si de multe ori ne poate fi cel mai mare dusman, atunci cand vine vorba de fericire. Propriile creiere ne pot face sa credem ca un lucru este corect, cand de fapt el este total gresit, ca suntem nefericiti cand de fapt suntem, etc. Sa inveti sa recunosti si sa depasesti aceste capcane este un lucru esential, daca vrei sa obtii fericirea de durata, relatii mai puternice si succes in cariera. 1. As fi mai fericit daca as avea mai putine de facut Mintile noastre adesea incearca sa ne faca sa credem ca am fi mai fericiti daca nu ar trebui sa muncim. Ne imaginam viata ca o vacanta continua si avem impresia (gresita) ca o astfel de viata ne-ar face fericiti. Totusi, adevarul este ca lipsa de activitate duce adesea la plictiseala si depresie. Suntem fiinte creative si active. Avem nevoie de provocari si realizari pentru a fi fericiti. Incepe sa faci ceva important pentru tine si vei vedea cum indicatorul fericirii incepe sa creasca. 2. Nu e vina mea, e vina ta De multe ori creierul ne face sa credem ca suntem nefericiti din cauza partenerului, a parintilor sau a altor persoane din viata noastra. Aruncam vina pe oricine din jurul nostru. Desigur, in orice relatie, responsabilitatea este a amandurora. Dar, in general, suntem la fel sau poate mai vinovati decat ceilalti din jur. Trebuie sa ne asumam responsabilitatea pentru situatia noastra si sa facem tot posibilul pentru a ne bucura la maxim de ea. A ne asuma responsabilitatea pentru actiunile noastre este inceputul fericirii adevarate. 3. Trebuie doar sa descopar secretul succesului pentru a fi fericit Nu exista "secrete" ale fericirii sau succesului. Desi multi scriitori, si chiar propriile noastre creiere, ar vrea sa ne convinga de existenta acestor scurtaturi, ele nu sunt reale. Sa ai o viata plina de succes este destul de simplu. Iti creezi o viziune pentru viitor, apoi un plan si apoi muncesti din greu pentru a ajunge acolo unde ti-ai propus. Nu exista secrete sau scurtaturi in aceasta formula. Daca accepti asta, vei inainta foarte mult pe calea spre fericire. 4. Daca as avea... Mintea noastra ne face sa credem ca vom fi fericiti cand vom avea slujba potrivita sau casa potrivita sau masina potrivita sau orice altceva. Nu este nimic gresit in a-ti dori lucruri mai bune, dar acestea nu garanteaza fericirea. Poate doar pentru o scurta perioada de timp, care va trece insa foarte repede. Cei care isi doresc fericirea de durata trebuie sa inteleaga ca aceasta este ca un gol pe care nu il vor putea umple niciodata. 5. Imi plac lucrurile asa cum sunt si nu vreau sa se schimbe niciodata Sa crezi asta inseamna sa fii pe un drum sigur spre esec. Viata presupune schimbari continue. Unele sunt sub controlul nostru, altele nu. Sa te opui schimbarii sau sa incerci sa o controlezi este in dezavantajul tau. Este un proces care te va epuiza si iti va rapi fericirea la care speri. Schimbarea este inevitabila. Trebuie sa accepti asta si sa inveti sa te lasi purtat de val. A putea sa te adaptezi este foarte important pentru fericirea ta. 6. Daca nu mi s-a intamplat inca, nu mi se va intampla niciodata Mintea noastra adesea se descurajeaza chiar atunci cand succesul este la un pas. Colonelul Sanders a atins succesul cu restaurantele KFC abia la varsta de 65 de ani, la 40 de ani dupa ce a inceput sa vanda produse din pui. Perseverenta este foarte importanta in drumul spre fericire. Nu-ti lasa mintea sa te pacaleasca sa renunti. Nu stii ce te asteapta maine. Inca o zi poate fi tot ce te desparte de visul tau! 7. Voi evita lucrurile care nu imi plac De obicei, mintea noastra vrea sa ne pacaleasca sa evitam sarcinile cele mai dificile. Insa, din pacate, acestea ne-ar aduce si cele mai mari recompense. Ce amani sa faci? De ce? Amanarea si evitarea sarcinilor importante sau enervante doar iti intarzie marsul spre fericire. Rezolva aceste probleme mai intai si implinirea pe care o vei simti iti va alimenta fericirea. 8. Lumea este infricosatoare si ceva rau mi s-ar putea intampla Creierul ne spune ca sunt multe lucruri pe care nu le putem controla. De exemplu, modul in care este "promovata" criminalitatea si teroarea la televizor, ne-ar putea da impresia ca agresorii ne pandesc la orice colt. Insa rata criminalitatii a scazut in ultimii ani. Conform statisticilor FBI, crimele violente sunt mai putin numeroase acum decat in urma cu 20 de ani. Teama ne poate motiva, dar nu intr-un fel pozitiv. Trebuie sa incercam sa avem incredere pentru a ne elibera si a fi fericiti. 9. Voi decide atunci cand voi fi sigur ce sa fac Sa te gandesti prea mult la orice decizie, oricat de minora, nu iti face bine. Este important sa cantaresti lucrurile, sa analizezi posibilitatile si sa faci planuri, insa nimic nu se intampla pana ce nu iei o decizie si actionezi. Rareori avem toate datele necesare atunci cand trebuie sa facem o alegere. Asa ca nu te mai gandi atat! Esecul nu este sfarstul lumii. Napoleon Hill scria: "Orice obstacol, orice esec, orice inima franta aduce si un beneficiu". Nu-ti lasa creierul sa te pacaleasca sa analizezi totul prea mult! 10. Stiu ca nu ar trebui, dar... Mintile noastre incearca sa ne faca sa negam efectele obiceiurilor proaste si sa gasesasca tot felul de scuze pentru acestea. Asta se intampla deseori cand vine vorba de sanatate. De exemplu, am auzit pe cineva spunand: "Stiu ca nu ar trebui sa fumez, dar ma ajuta sa-mi mentin silueta." sau "Stiu ca nu ar trebui sa mananc asta, dar viata pur si simplu nu merita traita fara asta." O problema grava de sanatate precum cancerul, boli ale inimii sau diabet cu siguranta nu te-ar face fericit. Nu-ti lasa creierul sa te pacaleasca in felul acesta! 11. Visele se implinesc numai pentru cei norocosi Thomas Jefferson spunea: "Cred cu tarie in noroc, si cu cat muncesc mai mult, cu atat sunt mai norocos." Mintea noastra ne va pacali uneori ca suntem victime ale destinului. Ne va face sa credem ca "nimic bun nu ni se intampla niciodata". Ceea ce creierul nostru pune pe seama norocului altora, este de fapt rezultatul a multi ani de practica, munca asidua si pregatire intensa. Urmeaza-ti visul din toata inima si s-ar putea sa fii surprins cum "norocul" iti va iesi in cale. 12. N-as putea niciodata... Creierul adesea ne face sa credem ca nu vom reusi. De exemplu, sunt persoane care spun "Nu as putea sa ma intorc la scoala, nu am bani" sau "Nu pot invata asta, sunt prea batran". Nu te lasa pacalit! Mintea este foarte persuasiva cand foloseste acest truc. Ai mult potential si chiar daca circumstantele sunt nefavorabile, cu perseverenta si multa munca poti depasi orice obstacol. Henry Ford spunea: "Daca crezi ca poti sau daca crezi ca nu poti, ai dreptate!" Nu lasa aceste trucuri sa te impiedice sa fii fericit!

How to Deal With Your Paranoia

It's a tough world out there, huh? When you feel like people are constantly out to trick or harm you, going about the day-to-day is plain exhausting. It's even worse when you know you're your worst enemy. How do you grab your paranoia and wrestle it into submission? How do you take control of how you see the world? Living paranoid isn't living. Read on. Part 1 of 3: Knowing Yourself and Your Mind Deal With Your Paranoia Step 1.jpg 1Get a jury. It may be hard to believe, but a certain level of paranoia is pretty common.[1] All of us have insecurities and all of us know what embarrassment feels like. Before you jump to conclusions and assume you're paranoid, get 4 or 5 friends together and ask them if your thought processes are understandable or, well, delusional. It's the only way to know. There are five levels to paranoia. Most of us have general feelings of vulnerability and suspicious thoughts ("I could get murdered down this dark alley!" or "They're talking about me behind my back, aren't they?"). But when you hit mild ("They're tapping their foot to annoy me"), moderate ("My phone calls are being tracked"), or severe ("The FBI is in my TV, watching me") personal threat, it's a sign you may be paranoid.[2] Deal With Your Paranoia Step 2.jpg 2Know that it could be due to drugs or alcohol. If you're doing drugs, taking prescription drugs, drinking, or even getting high on caffeine, you don't really have an accurate perception of "you." These drugs (uppers, specifically -- why caffeine counts!) alter your thought processes and put your mind on hyper mode. When it goes crazy with all the energy, you're much more likely to find something to freak out about. So get off 'em. If you're on prescription drugs and your paranoia seems to have onset when taking them, switch! You need to be yourself. You need to be yourself in order to know what you're actually up against. The drugs certainly don't help. Deal With Your Paranoia Step 3.jpg 3Think about your situation. Another thing to think about before we start tackling true, chronic paranoia, is your situation. If you've lost someone recently or you're going through a particularly stressful situation, give yourself some slack. This could be your mind's way of coping. Yeah, it sucks. It does. Life can do that. But it also passes. And quickly at that. If your paranoia seems to stem from a fairly recent situation (at least within the past six months), it's probably not chronic. It still deserves your attention and you should still deal with it proactively (like you are by reading this page!), but take solace in the fact that this too will pass. Deal With Your Paranoia Step 4.jpg 4Recognize your patterns. Once drugs, alcohol, and the situation are taken out of the equation, it's time to look at your patterns. All of us have mood swings of some sort, but not all of us are aware of when and why. Take a moment to think about when you feel most paranoid. Here's a few questions to jog your brain: Am I paranoid more in the morning, afternoon, or at night? Could it be because I'm tired? Am I paranoid more due to hormonal fluctuations? Might it have anything to do with the season? Does it happen more in specific environments? Work, school, at home? Once you've recognized your patterns, it'll be easier to recognize and deal with your paranoia. You can't deal with it until you've parsed out what's real and logical and what's not! Deal With Your Paranoia Step 5.jpg 5Know what paranoia really is. A lot of us use the term "paranoia" quite loosely. In fact, paranoid personality disorder (or PPD) is quite serious. However, there are several other, similar variations. PPD isn't that common, could it be anything else? PPD affects somewhere between .5% and 2.5% of the population. Its symptoms include:[3] Suspicion, without sufficient reason, that others are exploiting, harming, or deceiving you (especially with a faithful significant other) Preoccupation with unjustified doubts about the loyalty/trustworthiness of friends, family, etc. Reluctance to confide in others because of fear that it'll be used against you Reading hidden or threatening meanings into benign remarks or events Commonly bears grudges with ease Perceives personal attacks that are not apparent to others Quick to react angrily or to counterattack Paranoid schizophrenia involves hearing voices that can often mislead you. This person is often convinced they're very powerful or important and thus everyone revolves around them.[4] Delusional disorder is the belief in one very specific paranoia ("The FBI is in my TV watching my every move"). It's pinpointed and not necessarily global.[4] Deal With Your Paranoia Step 6.jpg 6Know if you have anxiety. It's similar to paranoia, sure, but the details are quite different. People with anxiety are serious worriers. They might think "My parents will die in a car crash." People with PPD think, "Someone will kill my parents to hurt me."[5] If you think anxiety might be your issue, consider reading wikiHow's How to Deal With Anxiety article to start. Anxiety is much more common than PPD. The average age of onset is 31, though it's most common among the 18 and older crowd. The symptoms of anxiety, or GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) mainly involve the inability to relax, startling easily, and having difficulty concentrating, amongst a plethora of physical symptoms. The good news is that it's highly treatable.[6] Deal With Your Paranoia Step 7.jpg 7See a psychiatrist. This is perhaps the most important point of all. A psychiatrist can help find the cause of the paranoia and talk you through how you're feeling. You can try to help yourself, sure, but you have a better chance of treating the paranoia if you see a medical professional. Seeing a psychiatrist is nothing to be ashamed of. Nothing. People do it all the time. Not people who are sick, but people who want to get better and improve their lives. Feel free to switch psychiatrists! Many people feel stuck with whichever one they start with. If you're not jiving, find a new one. Find one that makes you feel comfortable and that you can see yourself trusting. It'll be the quickest path to progress. People with paranoia tend to be afraid to share their problems. That aspect of paranoia is understandable because people who live with constant irrational fear think that their secrets will be leaked once they are heard. Remember that psychiatrists are trained to help you and will keep your secrets safe unless absolutely necessary. Part 2 of 3: Rewiring Your Brain Deal With Your Paranoia Step 8.jpg 1Think about how narcissistic paranoia really is. Consider this quote: "You'd worry less what others thought of you when you realize how seldom they do."[7] Part of being paranoid involves some pretty narcissistic thinking. C'mon, admit it. That's pretty self-aggrandizing, to think that everyone is wasting their energy on you. Do you waste your energy on them? Nope. So why would they? Sad as it may be, when you realize that you're just another human and you're not all that special (despite what mom may have told you), it's a little more difficult to be paranoid. People are wayyyy too concerned with how they look and are coming off to even give you a second thought. In this case, that's a GREAT thing. Deal With Your Paranoia Step 9.jpg 2Force yourself to think of a positive for every negative. Instead of telling you, "Think positively!" let's get a little more real: thinking positive is impossible to just start doing. You can stop negative thoughts, but you can't really create positive thoughts organically. So instead, every time you find yourself thinking a negative, think, "Crap. Now I gotta think of a positive." And force that positive one to come up. Just one. The idea here is that when "work" comes after the negative thought, eventually that negative thought won't come up to avoid the work! It acts as a deterrent. Best case scenario? The positive thinking starts becoming habit! Deal With Your Paranoia Step 10.jpg 3Tackle your insecurities. A large part of paranoia comes from not being comfortable with something about ourselves. If you know you're beautiful, you're not worried about people making fun of how you look, you know? Tackling your paranoia would sort of be like tackling the symptom -- the insecurity is the actual problem. A lot of it has to do with being confident. When you're confident, you're less likely to imagine that other people are speaking ill of you or looking to do you harm. Because you're awesome! You just gotta think that you are. Deal With Your Paranoia Step 11.jpg 4Get a larger focus. When we see a group of people laughing and we're convinced they're laughing about us, we're focusing on the very narrow picture. In fact, whatever these people are sniggering about is no big deal. Your day is much more important than that, the work that you and your team is doing is much more important than that, heck, world peace is a billion times more important than that. Think about widening your focus when you zero in on something small. Deal With Your Paranoia Step 12.jpg 5Focus on the concrete. Apart from widening your focus, try focusing on what's actually tangible. When you're paranoid, you're swept up in a world of unwarranted emotion. That world doesn't actually exist! Try to get out of that world and into the one of concrete things -- food, vacations, music, books -- a world that can't even be construed as being out to get you. If nothing else, focus on others. Not on what they're doing to you, but on their well-being. How can you be more empathetic? More sympathetic? Kind, caring, compassionate? Part 3 of 3: Rewiring Your Life Deal With Your Paranoia Step 13.jpg 1Don't act on it. Since you're on this page, you know you have paranoid tendencies. If nothing else, try hard not to act on your emotions. At least the ones you know are paranoid! Asking someone why they keep laughing at you when they're not just exacerbates the problem of feeling alienated and alone, you know? If you must act on your paranoia, be frank with people. Let them know that you have these tendencies. Instead of not knowing how to respond when the issue does come up, they'll be able to understand the reason behind your words. Deal With Your Paranoia Step 14.jpg 2Have a schedule. For those with paranoid tendencies, it's a good idea to have a set schedule. Even if it's just you and your life, you know what's coming up, what to expect, and what you have to tackle for that day. It's a form of solace, really. When you have a routine, feeling stable is a lot easier. This is good advice for most people. Humans in general find structure quite comforting. But if you have that extra bit of being obsessed with the unknown it's doubly important! Deal With Your Paranoia Step 15.jpg 3Meditate. Being paranoid all the time is exhausting and stressful. It's imperative that you take some time out of your day to relax and recenter. So start meditating! It won't happen the first day, it may not happen the first few days, but once you get into it, the calming effects of 20 minutes of meditation in the morning can take over your entire day. Deal With Your Paranoia Step 16.jpg 4Keep a diary. Sometimes paranoia can stop you from trusting people you've known all your life. And you can feel a lot of emotions about that -- guilt, anger and resentment, to name a few. When you really need an outlet for your emotions and you can't talk to anyone, write them in a diary. Diaries are a great way to let out your emotions in a calm way and as long as you keep your diary hidden, your secrets will always be safe. Know another method for How to Deal With Your Paranoia? Add it here... Add Method Tips Paranoia is not illegal and is nothing to be ashamed of. Don't blame yourself for having fear. You are a victim of this. If you think you should, get help. Just because you suffer from paranoia, it doesn't make you "insane." When you begin to label yourself, your self-esteem really sinks which doesn't help your overall problem. You are a person with some difficulties. That's all. Exercise and eat healthily. Learn how to meditate so that you can relax when the paranoid thoughts hit you. Learn to live with it. Paranoia is a long-term illness which can take years to treat and, even then, you still can't guarantee you will be paranoia-free for the rest of your life. If so, learn how to deal with it. You'll be able to live your life a little bit easier. Concentrate on your breathing and think of relaxing things, happy memories perhaps. If these fail, try mid level mental arithmetic.. for example, think to yourself 13 x 4, then work it out. Stay away from drugs and alcohol. You may feel that it helps. It doesn't. It only makes your paranoia worse. Keep in mind people for the most part are good. And they are not conspiring against you. Remember that no matter what happens, it will be okay in the end. Warnings Try to keep your suspicions about people between yourself and your psychiatrist. Also don't hurt them because of what you suspect them of doing. If you begin to have delusional beliefs (e.g. that the C.I.A. is watching you), seek help immediately. Don't keep all your emotions to yourself. It will only make it worse. If you bottle up your feelings, eventually they will all come out at once. Talk to someone you trust.